The Church ( a place of refuge or what?)

 I haven't been to church in a long while. The last time I was in church was 8th August 2021, a week before the demise of my twins. So yesterday, being the last Sunday for the month of November, I went to church. It was a Thanksgiving Service for the year. For me the atmosphere was the same, same old thing. Nothing really stood out for me save for the fact that I missed taking the Children and finding ways to make the department  grow. I asked myself why it felt like a charade and I got an instant answer. The place was also filled up with people who make others see them  the way  they've perceived others. Make no mistake, it was a Thanksgiving service and it was supposed to be an atmosphere of praise and thanks, however the disguise of unbrokeness was just transparent. There are people who do not talk to themselves in church (including me), have a grudge , envious, greedy, jealous and hate. Coming to church to pretend all is well when all isn't in terms of your relationship with others , your life and putting up a show just so that it feels like all is well and just so you 'pepper your opponent'  isn't Thanksgiving but whatever the opposite of Thanksgiving is. It's quite unfortunate that the church where you are to seek refuge and comfort becomes a zone of discomfort. People don't even share what God has done for them in church anymore for fear of the blessings being snatched away by evil people 😌😌😅. It's funny but it's not.. What I'm certain of is that God doesn't reject a broken and a contrite heart. So even in Thanksgiving, God seeks true worshippers. Not people who claim or have the appearance of righteousness but are direct opposite of what it stands for. There are some people who also claim to pray for those who they claim are their enemies but grin with so much hate and envy when they see things go well for them. Which way people?? May God deliver us!!